There Can Only Be One
Contributed by Xomar Mycron
Because nobody demanded it...I'm back, baby! Okay, that's not entirely true. One person, the world famous, award winning, fake ginger mistress of the blog did happen to mention that I hadn't sent her anything in months. I suddenly felt ashamed that I had been wrapped up in trying to keep my job in a crummy market by working most of my free time instead of goofing around on SL and making photos. Obviously, I most repent for that at some point, but luckily, the pope has stepped down today so I'm pretty sure I can put that off a bit.
I paid a visit to the Men's Dept. for this month and found a couple of great buys, but we'll just start with the skirt I'm wearing. Yes, apparently, the men (and I use that term loosely) in Scotland like to prance around wearing in skirts and growing their hair long for some reason. They say it's tradition, but, please. Some traditions need to die. I'm part American Indian, but you don't see me eating hallucinogenic mushrooms so I can trip the light fantastic and find my spirit guide. I mean, there was that one trip to Amsterdam, but that doesn't count. Anyways, I saw this kilt and I knew I had to buy it. Some of you are probably thinking, 'Oh yeah, because he wants to paint his face blue and go off on Jewish slurs while he talks about female cop's sugar tits like Mel Gibs...I mean William Wallace in Braveheart.' No, actually, the first thing that came to mind was THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE! I was about to Highlander up, bitches.
If you haven't seen the Highlander, well, you need to stop reading this and go pull it up on Netflix. Right now. I'll wait. *drinks a glass of scotch in honor of the Highlander* Okay, I can't actually verify if you watched it, but if you didn't, you're a failure as a human being. The rest of you know why the legendary Ricky Bobby mistakenly thought this movie won the Oscar for best movie ever made. Starring the odd looking Frenchie Christopher Lambert as a Scotsman with the worst Scottish accent pretty much ever, he discovers he's an Immortal and must fight all the other Immortals until only one is left. After meeting with the actual Scotsman and pretty much coolest man alive Sean Connery, who even stranger, isn't playing a Scot, but a Spaniard or maybe an Egyptian with what is actually the best Scottish accent in the movie, but probably not purpose, he trains to become an expert sword fighter since the only way to kill another Immortal is to cut off his head.
So, anyways, this was my chance to channel my Gorean ego once again by wearing long, flowing hair as I swung around a gigantic, not overcompensating for anything, broadsword. I was inspired by his training montage where he inexplicably practiced sword techniques at the top of towering mountains, mostly for the arial shots, I'm sure. Because, when I lost my sword at the bottom of that mountain, I would have just said, 'fuck it...I'll buy another one.' Speaking of another one...*heads off for another glass of Scotch*
Credits:
Skirt: !gO! - Maccloy Kilt
Shirt: Snatched - Buccaneer outfit
Boots: Coco Designs - group gift Suede Boots
Ridiculous Fabio Hair: Wasabi Pills - Hawk
